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Jaida Li

December 23, 2009 started off as an ordinary day but little did we know Christmas was coming early and we would be receiving the greatest Christmas present ever.

It was a typical winter day with light snow showers which I always enjoy. With not much to do and, like everyone else, not much money to spend, Jenny and I would venture out to spend the day together for some window shopping at the mall after an early lunch.

The mall parking lot was packed because of all the Christmas shoppers. I dropped Jenny off near entrance of the mall so she could go ahead and put our names on the list at our beloved Cheesecake Factory.

I had to drive out to the south forty where I still had to wait for a parking spot. I hustled back to meet Jenny in the busy restaurant where we were seated in a small booth after a short wait.

Opposite of those around us, we were in no great hurry and just wanted to enjoy being together and enjoying the food. After being accosted by grinches at the table across from us, our waitress came over and greeted us with a smile. Wanting to be totally opposite of the “mean” table, we tried to put our waitress at ease, letting her know we were in no hurry.

Normally, when we dine out, we eat more than any human should be allowed to consume. Wanteing to watch our spending and our waists, we intentionally ordered slowly and ordered less. A couple of appetizers and some potato soup would hit the spot on this cold, snowy day.

Our waitress brought out the soup and our conversation turned to the consuming, yet repetitive topics around our long-awaited adoption. Over this four-year long process, we’ve waded through so many emotions, from feeling hopeful to feeling discouraged like it would never happen. After the second year, we actually had the hard conversation to determine whether we were going to quit or keep going through the international adoption process. We were in too deep to quit and too stubborn to give up. So, circling back in our conversation to the girl we longed for was a normal part of our lives. The adoption referral could come at anytime but we were still feeling like it was still so far out of reach.

As we turned to enjoy our soup, Jenny began to share with me what she had written in her journal just a couple of days ago. With a disappointed yet positive spirit, Jenny said, “I’ve been praying and asking God that we would get our referral before Christmas, but, I guess it’s not going to happen. So, I just hope that something will happen before your birthday in January.” I responded with the same optimism and tried to portray a hopeful attitude as well.

Less than two minutes later, my phone rang. I glanced down to see if I recognized the number but I didn’t. I picked up the phone, held it up so Jenny could see the number and asked her if she knew who it might be. She said, “That’s the area code of Iowa, where our case worker lives.” I attempted to answer the call at the last minute but the call had just gone to voicemail. Jenny hurriedly looked in her purse to check her phone. For some reason, she didn’t hear her phone ring just a minute earlier. The caller had just left a voicemail so Jenny began listening to the message.

She looked at me with eyes widening by the second, followed by tears. With her mouth wide open covered by a hand in disbelief and unable to speak, she looked at me and mouthed the words, “We just got a referral!”

Adrenaline rushed through my body and accelerated the sudden mixture of joy and bewilderment. We sat there with smiles and amazement like a five-year old on Christmas morning. We didn’t know what to do. Jenny called the number back and Bonnie, our case worker, answered the phone. In a short excited conversation, Bonnie informed us of the referral details of our new daughter. She shared that our little baby was almost one-year old to the day and was considered a “special needs” child because of a small hole in her heart but was in great health. She was sending everything over to us in an email and let us know we had two weeks to decide, but the sooner the better. Bonnie stated that this little girl was so beautiful and conveyed that she was very excited for us.

After a few seconds of mindless staring, we were all of a sudden calling on our waitress to bring us our check. We wanted to get the heck out of Dodge and get home to see this referral email and feast our eyes on the pictures of the little Chinese girl who we named Jaida Li and had been praying for almost four years. We dreamed about her in our hearts but now we get to see her with our eyes.

The check couldn’t come fast enough. We bolted out of there and got to the car quicker than any speed walker in the country. I started up the car and we began plowing through the snow. I kept glancing over at Jenny. Every time I found her with eyes hazed over and mouth hanging open, unaware of anything that was going on around her.

The unbelievably happy thoughts were also being bombarded by a sudden anxiety. Like every parent, deciphering through the crazy mental circus going on was crashing into our drive home. What if she’s has more medical issues than we can handle or afford to take care of? What if she’s not a cute baby? Are we going to choose her or pass her by and risk waiting another four years? It’s the toxic mix of elation and fear that comes with the unknown in life to all who are halfway conscious.

We calmly pulled the car into the garage, went into the house, took off our coats and headed to my office. I opened up my computer, pulled up the email and immediately scrolled down to the pictures. The first picture they sent was around the time she entered the orphanage and it was, you guessed it, ugly. But the shock passed with the second and third pictures of a healthy, beautiful little girl. I knew right then that she was my Jaida. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful! Whew!  :)

Jaida Li

For those of you who don’t know my wife, there are two of her. I jokingly call one, “fun Jenny” and the other, “business Jenny.” “Fun Jenny” has no agenda, loves to talk and be around people, but “business Jenny” focuses and pours herself into a task full of details with no regards for chit chat, tomfoolery or distracting conversation.

“Fun Jenny” was thrown to the mat. Down goes Frasier!  :)

“Business Jenny” takes over to thoroughly inspect the multiple documents containing pertinent information about her location in China, the conditions surrounding her entering the orphanage, her medical condition, her personality traits and other personal insights.

After a little “technical” conversation, we both just stopped and looked at each other. “Fun Jenny” appeared out of nowhere and said with a smile of amazement, “This is our daughter! I can’t believe it is finally happening. I don’t know what to think. I don’t know if it’s really hit me yet.”

After a little time to share the moment and get ourselves together, we began calling our family, friends and anybody who had been a part of this four-year long journey.

Every time I share the story, Jaida became more and more real to me. I can’t tell you how much support we feel from everyone. Everybody makes Jenny and I feel like she’s their kid, too!

We surprised our church on Christmas Eve with the news the next day. After the welcome time before I began singing the next Christmas song, I said, “Jenny and I have an early Christmas present. If you’ll look to the video screens, we’ll show you a picture.” As soon as Jaida’s picture came up, the room erupted. You would have thought we were at a football game and the home team just scored. Our church has been the most encouraging and excited group of people I have ever been around. God has blessed our little girl with crazily excited parents and an insanely loving church. I know we’re not alone and get to share our journey with the people of Journey Church.

It’s been an amazing few weeks, sharing the story and sharing the excitement. We’re getting things ready and preparing for our trip to China sometime at the end of March or early April to go get our daughter. There’s still much to do, but we look forward to the future days of the extended Lohse family.

More coming soon. Thank you, everyone and thank you, Jesus!