thrive community

There aren’t many television shows I like to watch our regular basis, but one of them is Extreme Home Makeover. About a month ago, the show was about a young man named Bernard McFarland. He’s known in his community as a person who makes a difference. He began an outreach for young boys in the same community where he grew up and currently lives in the neighborhood with his three teenage sons.

His heart and passion was indescribable. The emotion in which he talked about his boys, his community, and the need he sees around him was amazing. It made me want to jump through the television and go help him at that moment. Bernard was doing much with almost nothing. He was living in a dilapidated home, using a broken down Van and a tiny concrete slab for a basketball court to reach dozens of needy kids. But he was making a difference.

When the Extreme Home Makeover team arrived, he met them with great joy and overwhelming tears. As the show revealed what they were doing for him and giving to him, he was thankful at every turn. He would always turn to his boys, hug them and draw them in to let them know that he loved them and that he appreciated this blessing they were to share as a family.

But one thing really stood out to me. As the team inquired as to why he did what he did,Bernard began to share about how his pastor had preached a sermon a long time ago that stuck with him to this very day. The point of the message was this — “lift as you climb.”

“All of this wasn’t about me,” Bernard said. “I was just doing what was in my heart.”

The phrase “lift as you climb” was a seed that had taken root deep in his heart, transforming the way he lived. This phrase should also be the statement that is rooted in the heart of everyone who follows Jesus.

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A spiritual mentoring relationship can be like no other you’ll ever have, but finding one can be a very challenging task, especially when you don’t know where to begin.

We all need someone to learn from, to be a sounding board for decisions and to help us see our potential. The growing desire for someone further along in the faith to encourage us, teach us and give us guidance in life is easy to detect, but the hard part is discovering who a spiritual mentor could be or should be.

It’s vitally important that you find someone who is able and willing to do life with you. But there’s more to it than just what your mentor will bring to the table. It involves what you bring to the relationship as well.

The greater search is to discover what this relationship will require of you. A healthy mentoring relationship is a two-way connection of giving and taking, investing as well as receiving. Expectations will flow both ways so you and your mentor have a great deal of searching to do and clarifications to make.

Here are a few things to think about as you begin this process…

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So many Christ followers are looking for a spiritual family to help them. There is a desperate need for spiritually mature men and women to mentor young Christians, helping them to clarify what really matters in life.

I am amazed at how many new Christians don’t have anyone to turn to for encouragement, support, counsel and teaching. God intended for his people to be like a family. It’s very clear from Scripture that family relationships are the primary catalyst to life learning and transformation (Deut. 6:4-8)(Eph. 6:4). But instead of helping new believers become rooted and established in healthy relationships, most churches place the major emphasis on programs, attending services, Bible studies, church events, or other ministries.

Don’t get me wrong. These environments are necessary and important for Christ followers to receive needed Biblical education and be exposed to the many essential concepts concerning their faith in Jesus, but God’s primary “delivery system” for life transformation and discipleship is best initiated and sustained through personal relationships. Nothing can take the place and fill the void that every human being has for authentic relationships. We assume they will happen naturally, but they don’t.

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